Moms Karlie Kloss and Ashley Graham on "Snapback" Culture: "I'm Not Trying to Go Back"

When Ashley Graham answers the phone, she sounds pretty calm for a mom of three. It's the end of a busy Monday, but she finds a moment to sit outside her home in New Jersey to watch the rain. When I ask her if she's having a full Drew Barrymore moment, she laughs and says she plans to remain dry for our conversation. Shortly after, Karlie Kloss joins the call and it feels like I'm part of a girl gang, the support for each other evident in how Graham comforts Kloss's tardiness: "It's Monday and we're just trying to get through. I feel you."

The pair share a fierce friendship that only grew as they became mothers, as well as investors in the surprisingly chic diaper brand Coterie. Between the two of them, they have four boys. Graham has 3-year-old son Isaac and 1-year-old twins Malachi and Roman, and Kloss has Levi, age 2.

Besides finding commonality in motherhood, the two are internationally renowned models and intimately familiar with the pressures of "snapback culture." On social media, Graham, in particular, has been open about postpartum life in an effort to normalize body changes like hair loss and stretch marks. Both women agree that childbirth has impacted the relationship they have with their bodies.

"I mean, I still look at mine and I don't recognize it. I'm like, 'Where did you come from? I never saw you before,'" Graham says. "But that doesn't mean that I'm not going through the same steps that I've been preaching from the rooftops of acceptance and body neutrality and just coming to a space where I just can be happy that my body is working, my body is moving."

And part of body neutrality is accepting this new normal. "Like, I'm not trying to go back to something," she explains. "I had to have that talk with myself a few times, but I think as long as you have the tools and you know that it's in you, it can happen. It can be a tough road watching your body change. At least for me, it was a tough road watching my body change so drastically with all these pregnancies back to back. And, you know, just throwing in a twin pregnancy and seeing your stomach get stretched out."

That's exactly what we should see more of, Graham says: the real postpartum experience. "I felt like I have such a big following and I have shared so much up until this part of my life that I needed to share this as well, to normalize so much that happens to our bodies . . . and how things just sometimes don't go back to normal."

It helps to have a friend going through a similar journey. "Ashley is my inspiration in real life, on social media, in all things motherhood. She's a force," Kloss says about their friendship. "And I appreciate all that you share about your own experience. Knowing you as one of my closest friends and seeing how fearless you've been in this entry into motherhood, really showing the best and also the hard parts of it, thank you for that."

Motherhood has also given them a newfound respect for what the human body can accomplish. "Somebody said to me, 'Your body will be different after having a child.' But in their experience, they liked their body more," Kloss says. "And I feel wholeheartedly that way. I have much less judgment and more genuine appreciation for all that my body has done for me. It's very cliché, but turns out it's really true."

Besides having an extensive support system, the two shared the secret tool that helped them rein in the anxiety of pregnancy: The Excel Sheet. This miracle list is full of all the products Graham "couldn't have gone without" and gets sent around to any of their friends who become pregnant. "When Karlie got pregnant with Levi, I shared The Excel Sheet," Graham confirms. Coterie, of course, is on the list. "It's my go-to for diapers."

She continues, "I became involved with them after I knocked on their door a hundred times and was like, who are you guys? I love you. I found your diapers online, let's be partners," Graham laughs, "and persistence is key."

Diaper changing is one of the first rites of passage for parenthood, and therefore comes with plenty of stories. "When I did my son's nursery, I put this beautiful blue cloth wallpaper up that I thought would be so soft and cozy. Then I put his changing table right against the wall," Kloss recounts. "Of course, what does he do? Immediately pees on the wall."

And with Graham's eldest, Isaac, it doesn't sound like potty training has made things easier. Recently, Graham was interrupted with a common parenting request: "Mom, smell my butt." "I was like, 'Did you poo poo in your big-boy underwear?' And he said, 'I think so, but look, it's on the couch.'" To her horror, the Sports Illustrated model turned to find their "beautiful, stunning, oatmeal-beige couch" covered in, well, you can probably guess.

Kloss interrupts to tease, "Well that's your own fault, my friend. I mean, light beige!"

Despite the initial trauma, it left Graham with a pretty good method to handle stains. "Pro tip to get diarrhea out of a couch that has been Scotchgarded: water, vinegar with a little Dawn soap. And it came right out. Just so you know."